7 Reasons Why Finding Happiness for Yourself Isn’t Selfish

Do you put dresses back in the aisle because there are expenses to incur? Do you cancel your plans because your partner made both of yours without running them by you? Trust me, when it comes to making sacrifices for the sake of others’ happiness, we champion that. Not because we like to make sacrifices, but because we think doing the opposite might make someone unhappy. We cannot do that. Why? Because apparently, that’s selfish.

Well, at least that’s what we think. But here’s a piece of truth. Finding your happiness, or doing things that make you feel happy is not being selfish. If you think it is, you better not skip reading what I have to say.

7 reasons why finding happiness for yourself isn’t selfish

1. You are supposed to live your life, not just survive it

There’s a difference between surviving and living. Surviving means you are just going through life without

enjoying it with no concern about happiness. A life of survival just means stress and misery. Life is too short to live this way.

So, your goal should not be survival but living. Do all the things that you love to do – even when it involves disagreeing with people. You have to listen to yourself as well, don’t be someone who looks up to the voices from outside and ignores the ones inside.

2. You are a human

You are a human; you are not a superhuman who can keep everyone happy. Trust me, keeping everyone pleased and satisfied is not possible even if it is a superpower that humans can have.

So, once in a while focus on yourself too. If you know something can make you happy – get it. Even the little things like the dress you had your eyes on but did not buy it because other family members had expenses to incur. Little things count. And if they make you happy – don’t think twice.  

3. You have to save yourself

Sometimes you won’t stand up for yourself just because there’s a risk involved – hurting others and you

depend on them. But trust me when I say this – if you don’t stand up for yourself, no one will. You can save yourself from the fall if you push yourself up.

People who genuinely care about you won’t judge you for choosing your happiness. In fact, they’ll understand your situation. At the end of the day – happiness is a basic need.

4. Putting yourself first doesn’t mean you’re disregarding others.

Don’t feel guilty about putting yourself first. It’s not a crime to think about yourself. If you are not comfortable doing something, don’t do it. At the same time, don’t think, saying “No” is equal to disregarding others’ feelings. If they feel disregarded, it speaks about their character. They might even be the toxic lot you should stay away from.

So, the next time, your colleague hands you over a pile full of files after your shift ends, say  No, or if your friends force you into smoking knowing that you don’t, do not hesitate – Say NO.

5. You deserve to be taken care of – If not by others, then by yourself.

Ask yourself, are you the one who takes care of everybody? You make sacrifices for them, go the extra mile

to make them happy? If yes, you’re definitely an angel. But just so you know, angels take care of themselves too.

So, if you think asking your family to be responsible for cleaning their dishes would allow you a moment of peace and rest, go ahead and speak your mind. Examples can be many but the point remains the same – it’s equally important to take care of yourself.

6. Your happiness matters too

You keep on making sacrifices, doing things you don’t want to as if your happiness is not important as that of others. But it is not true. Your happiness, your choices matter because you are the sailor of your own boat. As said before, you have to live life, not survive it. The only way to do that is to do things and make choices that make you happy.

7. Your purpose in life is not to please people

Your purpose in life might be to help people, but it’s not to please people. You don’t owe it to anybody to keep them happy and satisfied. So, you might as well live a life without bothering yourself with the task. Pleasing people is not an obligation, so stop treating it as one.

Having said that, you’re more than just a people pleaser; you’re not the manager of a restaurant who has to keep their customers happy and satisfied. So, it’s time you come to terms with reality and start finding your own happiness.

 

I hope these reasons changed your mind. But once again, keeping yourself first is not being selfish – it just means you’re listening to yourself. That’s not something you should be ashamed of.