How to Get your Partner to Open Up

Communication is a two-way street. However, if you happen to have a partner who does not communicate often, and does not share their feelings, it can be quite disappointing and annoying for you. But you cannot blame them either, because it’s all about comfort and one’s choices. At the same time, you cannot neglect communication because it’s healthy for your relationship and your partner’s wellbeing, especially if they keep their vulnerabilities to themselves and eventually it makes them crack up.

So, what do you do in this scenario? Well, first you can try to get your partner to open up.  Here’s how you can do that –

5 ways to get your partner open up

1. Be honest with them and make them feel comfortable

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First and foremost, be honest with them. If you witness a changed behavior, then simply ask, “How are you?” “What has been bothering you?” “Did something happen?”

Let them know that they need to be honest with you. Let them know how their silence is killing you. While you are at it, always maintain your calm. Do not be furious, it is no way to get them to open up to you. Remember, you have to make them comfortable, not afraid and infuriated.

2. Share your vulnerabilities

Sometimes your partner will feel uncomfortable being vulnerable in front of you, especially if you are in a new relationship. This is when you have to take the first step, and share your own stories, your own vulnerabilities.

Let them know about the time you were crumbling, falling on your knees. While you are at it, let them know it’s okay. Everyone feels this way, and it’s natural because it is a part of being a human. And they should not be afraid to do the same in front of you. You would not judge them, instead, you will do all you can to lift them. You are their safe haven.

3. Be a good listener

When you want people to uncover their life in front of you, you have to be a good listener. Let them know that you

are there to listen. Let them know it’s important to let out because it does feel better in the end. Once they start, listen to them quietly, and then respond. But just so you know, you don’t always have to respond. You can just hold their hand, hug them, and let them know that you are with them every step of the way.

4. Be more understanding

Understanding is the essence of any relationship. However, if you do not make efforts to understand your partner, yell at them, pour all your mood swings and whims at the time when they are struggling, then they would never open up with you.

The key here is to be a bit more understanding. To do that, it’s best to place yourself in their shoes and imagine how they must be feeling. In that case, how would you want people to treat you? You might not feel their pain but you can certainly understand it.

5. Set a time for talking

By this, we do not mean that you have to create a schedule, wherein you would talk at every fixed hour of the

day. No, what we mean is, decide a time to talk because your timing matters a lot. If you are talking to them when they are exhausted or occupied with their work, it’s of no use. Instead, do it whenever you both aren’t preoccupied.

Ps, A friendly reminder, your talks must not lead to fights, it will give them another reason not to open up with you.

Lastly,

All you can do is try. Even if all these things do not work, don’t give up, maybe all they need is a little space. Forcing conversations when they are going through something, or when they need space, would do more harm than good. So let them be, allow them some time, and wait once they feel okay again.

Hey, how do you get your partner to open up? Do you have some ideas and opinions you can share? We are all ears, drop them in the comments below.