Ways to Start Building a Relationship and Keeping the Spark Alive

When you have been in a long-term relationship for a while, it’s inevitable that you slowly see the spark fading. This happens due to the monotony of daily life, work schedules, to-do lists, household chores and many more.

Most couples struggle to maintain a balance between their personal and professional lives, which results in the fading of the spark. It’s also entirely possible to take each other for granted when you’ve been together for a significant period of time and stop putting work to keep the connection strong and alive. Add in kids, and all the different activities they require, and your relationship might be on autopilot. 

Whatever the reason may be, there’s always time to rekindle the relationship and keep it alive for the long term. Let us help you get some new ideas. 

Ways to Start Building a Relationship and Keeping the Spark Alive

Here are 5 ways to start building a relationship and keeping the spark alive

1. ‘I love you’ is overrated

Confessing your love for each other is an important practice to keep the relationship alive and healthy. But often, we use this phrase so mechanically in our daily routine that the phrase loses the intensity of its meaning.

While it’s important to remind each other of your love, it’s equally important to convey other emotions and affections to your partner, such as saying, “You make my life so special,” or “I’m grateful to have you.”

Impromptu confessions like this help keep the romance in the relationship alive and well. These simple phrases might even make your partner’s day better. I know hearing something special from Steve when my day has been terrible picks me right up and makes me feel better. 

2. Start the habit of deep conversations

Open and honest conversations are the foundation of any relationship. However, how often do you have a deep and

meaningful conversation with your partner that is not centered on kids or work?

I know what you must be thinking. There’s never enough time! Well, to maintain a healthy, rounded relationship, it is important that you make the time. “What is something you really want out of life?” or something along these lines can be the question you ask your partner at dinner, or maybe while the both of you are enjoying a glass of wine.

Try to make the conversations deep and meaningful, something that will let you know each other better. If you aren’t much of a talker, maybe writing things down might be better for you and your partner. I found a 3 year couples journal called, “The Two of Us” which offers a daily question and each person gets to write their thoughts or short blurbs each night on the topic. Sometimes they are serious, while others are funny. It really makes you think and learn things about your partner you wouldn’t have otherwise known because the questions aren’t the most common. 

3. Laugh together, live together

Enjoying a good laugh with your partner reinvigorates your relationship like no other. After all, laughter is the best medicine. Try to find the humor in your arguments and fights, but not in a way that discredits your partner’s feelings.

Watch a comedy movie together, share memes and engage in banter like middle-school kids. Keeping that childlike innocence and humor alive in your relationship is very important to sustain it. Steve and I always joke around and laugh with each other — it’s probably one of my favorite things that keeps the spark alive. 

4. Bring something new into your equation

It is so easy to fall into a rut and let your relationship become a part of your routine. To keep the spark alive, it’s

important to change things up from time to time, and invest time in trying out something new.

Break free from your normal habits and do a new activity together. This will bring the fun and excitement back to your relationship, and seeing your partner in a new environment will also help you get to know them better. Experience falling in love with your partner all over again.

One activity Steve and I have brought in is The Adventure Challenge. We do this as a couple, as a family, with friends, and even started using their new, “The Adventure Challenge In Bed,” book to have a little fun when it might otherwise be boring. Click the link above and use my code SPICEITUP for 15% off your order!

5. Never too late to impress each other

When you have been in a relationship for a while, you start taking each other for granted and stop making the efforts to impress each other, like you would have done in a brand new connection.

If your partner appreciates you and tells you that you look good even in sweats, then they deserve a little more effort on your part. Dress up or surprise them with a gift, things you do in the beginning stages of courtship. Take the time to woo your partner all over again, and feel the spark come alive in your relationship.

Finally,

It takes effort to build and sustain a healthy, long-term relationship. You have to spice things up from time to time so that it doesn’t get boring and insipid. Most importantly, you and your partner have to be on the same page regarding this, so that your work doesn’t go in vain.

Try to remember the feelings you harbored in the very beginning, and attempt to recreate that same romance. Trust your partner, and communicate your needs and wants to them openly. If you want your partner to make more of an effort, discuss this with them. There is nothing that helps more than talking and sharing.